![]() The abused child will feel rejected and unlovable whilst the favoured one may only feel worthy for external factors e.g. In these cases, both children are likely to suffer from low self-worth. There was favouring in your family – in toxic families, often one child will be favoured and the other will bear the brunt of the abuse – the designated scapegoat. If after spending time with certain family members you feel any of the following, this should serve as a signal that the dynamic is not serving you: feeling drained, back and neck pain, jaw-clenching, digestive troubles or a tightness in your stomach. ![]() Physical symptoms after (or during) time spent with family members – emotional distress impacts the body as well as the mind. ![]() That’s because over time the behaviour becomes normalised.īelow are some of the signs to look out for: If you’re still in the middle of a toxic dynamic, it can be very difficult to see the situation clearly for what it is. Sometimes toxic behaviour is obvious, other times it is more subtle and seeps into our psyche without us even realising. Living in a toxic household – what are the signs? If you believe you grew up in a dysfunctional family, identifying the toxic behaviour and how it impacted you is imperative so that you can grieve, heal and also break the pattern once and for all. The mind feels comfortable in the familiar which is why children of alcoholics are at a greater risk of marrying an alcoholic (or becoming one) and more than half of abused children (51%) will experience abuse again in later life. If you grew up in a dysfunctional family, it’s going to shape the kinds of relationships you form in later life – both when it comes to love and friendships, and perhaps even professionally too. Because of this, if a child grows up around toxic behaviour they’re likely to either normalise it or internalise it by believing it’s their fault – and often both.įamily – and particularly our parents (or primary caregivers) – form the basis for our self-worth, how we connect and what we believe relationships to be. As children, we don’t have the ability to identify between “right” and “wrong”, and healthy or unhealthy behaviour. Toxic family and psychology – why identifying you grew up in a dysfunctional family is essential If your family was dysfunctional, on the other hand – unfortunately – your experiences are likely to have been very different.įamily dynamics can be toxic in all kinds of different ways, and we’re going to be exploring some of the signs you grew up in a dysfunctional family here.īut first, let’s look at why family is so important – psychologically speaking. If you grew up in a loving, functional family, difficulties will have been resolved in an open, communicative and healthy way. Have you ever found yourself staring longingly at that adoring family who look like the perfect picture of happiness and love – and wonder why yours can’t be more like that?Īll families have arguments and go through rough patches (we’re human, after all).
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